january juggle

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم الحمد لله

so its january , its a very long month for me.
tho i am free, i couldn't get myself form the overloading work and reports in uni.

last year was a pack year for me. i didn't met new people that much.
this year, how should i shape my my ambitious 2015 is still a wonder.

a friend of mine told me that i should look back of what i have done, and search for the reason behind those doing. maybe my aims are too high. maybe i am lacking of a substance to go forward.

last night party i met a handful of new people. some are from a place you never heard before, some who is well, have to looks exactly like the locals, and some came from a super rich family.
kazakhstan, only a handful got the best education and they end up going abroad. you can say these people is pretty darn rich. that includes the Chinese too. i have been mingling with so many people from different class to the extend i am somehow grateful of who i am. but i could not forget this guy whom i met during PAU . he said

you are lucky and did a good job to be able to mingle with the upper class

and i thought, shouldn't it be the opposite? shouldn't it be that the upperclass gets to mingle with the lower class is where the true way should be ? i was pretty lump and dump to not reply his words, or more like i am just in the mood of agreeing and not create any conflict. this relates to where i grew up it is a very safe, average, peaceful home. obviously you would wish to change that for a better , wouldn't you? its the matter of are you ( am i ) ready for the risk?

and my very very very helpful senior talked to me and encourage me to do what i want, and never hesitate to ask his help nor his assistance. whether i am going to do it through his company or associated with his company, either way both seems promising. i pray i beg i could get hold (secure) of an idea really quick.
aim big ? aim crazy ?

and in the midst of all this school, life, and goal, you start to know who are your true friend. who is there to really help you, and who broke ur promise until the very last minute. how it hurt so much, but getting mad, despair, angry at those people, are just a waste of time, and non would be a better favour for both of the party. i just could not get angry face to face because i know a "girl" war would start, and who knows when will it end. let me just keep it and buried in soundly. let there be no more spark for a fight.

heres for the finals.
may be force be with me


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