Tuesday, August 6, 2013

last hours

assalamualaikum and morning

i am now currently waiting for my flight back to hometown country , Malaysia :D
the feeling is mixed. half of me feel so excited and happy to come back home,  but another half of me feel sad, sad that i am gonnna move forward and left all the memories i collected during my first semester in university, sad that i didnt do well in my finals and yet i am having a celebration as if i had done the finals "so" well. its like i dont deserve to have such holiday to compared with the effort i put during the exam . but whats past is past. let bygone be bygone. all that is left is keep on istiqamah in praying and tawakkal everything to Him. he knows best !

i left my room in a hurry and catch the midnight bus and straight arrive at narita airport. and goodness me, i think i slept in the utmost ugly condition. but who cares since i aint gonna see those people in bus no more. i am so shocked that non are actually coming from eaurope country riding the bus. well its summer so i expect them to go back home to but its filled with japanese in the other word asian .

and frankly speaking i enjoyed my first semester like no one cares . every week its filled with non stop activities. its whether i go somewhere, or someone come to my place. everyday its full of laughter and interesting finding . but whats obvious is i know how japanese are really like and how they think , work, or even study . one conclusion i can make for the time being is, kansai people are very interesting and funny !

so till then . till we meet again and i will be writing from malaysai :D

Saturday, July 13, 2013


and its holiday again

its 3days holiday here in japan (which rarely happen) but i aint planning on going for a holiday . how stupid was i .
should have gone somewhere and use my time wisely.

but the freaking thing that keeps me thinking all the time is actually the fact that everyday there's an event needed to be attend. why cant everything just happen on the same day ? i prefer a day to be really packed rather than one event per day. its like i am restricted to go somewhere far. grrrrrr plus what makes me mad or rather sad is that i got no one to go to Harry Potter exhibition together. major turn down. but somehow, its true, "rezeki Allah luas" kalau bukan sekarang nnt ada rezeki lain kan . sebab tuh la we have to keep on striving and never give up  . and thats why i am just thankful that i am a Muslim. maybe i aint a complete muslim yet but every small steps count. you dont expect to change 180 degree just in one night. that is something that the people here dont understand . i just wish they receive the hidayah from the All Mighty . i just wish they would embrace the beauty of what i am experiencing . Okay !

Friday, July 5, 2013


and this happened. 
assalamualaikum and morning. 

i woke up early today . didnt know whats the reason Allah woke me up this early but i guess He made it happen so i can finish up my work. and yea i got lots of report and also gonna have to study for semester exam. it aint sound that bad isnt it. just a couple of of works to do.

and i quit my baito. not because i hate it but just because i got other priorities to think about. my real reason coming to japan isnt to work and enjoy life. i have my goal, more like i have my goal in life (which people here don't) it aint a bad thing, really. it just take time to set your own goal in life.

my goal is basically based on Islam basis. how crazy and maniac i may act. i am still a muslim. and i will forever hold to it, insyallah ! islam is the only religion that have every thing in life guided . islam is a way of life. it help me to always keep on going in life positively, never give up or look down. it is always there for me.

i was shocked when a friend of mine asked me, how could i always look so happy and cheerful ?
i was like , goodness . isnt that obvious. i am not gonna potray my sadness to the others.(still trying my best on this) if i do so, the people around me will get the impact of my sadness. and then the sadness will infect everyone. (dammit ! my english is corroding) plus if and only if failure occur in my life, i believe Allah always plan it better. there are always a reason to his each and every action . so never stop trying cuz Allah has set a better future for you. and challenges are given to those who is capable to endure it. He knows all. Allahu Akbar. 

Monday, April 29, 2013

Inilah jepun

Salam and hey!
Its been a month now since i arrived japan. An now only i will start writing back in this blog. Not that i am lazy. But its been busy and i am yet to adapt to the current situation here.plus I would be lying to say nothing differs from japan and malaysia.

Tho i have been here 4 years ago for a trip, but studying? It is another story. Non of us will expect that the challenges are hard cuz all they see in the media was japan full of fun anime, cute characters and awesome techno gizmo. No doubt part of it is true.

Tapi apa yg ingin saya katakan ialah cabaran hidup susah. Lagi lagi pabila saya yang memilih jalan ini sendiri. Sya on purpose pilih dai yg mana x ramai malaysian, best location for international airport dan suasana. Sbb i anti-kampung melayu. Dan sebab itulah ia menjadi cabaran utk sya hidup sorang2 as a perempuan muslim malaysian yg menjaga batas dan larangan agama. Mmg perasaan give up dan go with the flow itu wujud.

Jadi lets KISS. Skrg sya mmg rasa kena tabah cekal to face all of this by myself. Masih ramai org di sini yang tidak tahu apakah itu Islam dan keindahannya. Saya bukan nak jd tabligh, tetapi hanya ingin membuka mata dan memberitahu apakah itu islam. Nak ckap xda islam, sini ade je islam, tp entah la pelik sya. Dan sya berharap dlm smasa saya belajar kat sini kalau bukan sekumpulan tetapi seorg individu yg berjaya phm apakah itu islam.

And therefore i beg to You, the most mighty ,Allah to keep me on the right path and guide me towards jannah. Insyallah

Monday, March 18, 2013


mmg kadang3 we do feel sad like suddenly. guess that my nikmat of happiness is being taken by Allah for a while. i should appreciate more when i am happy. Alhamdulillah for opening my heart back.

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Saturday, March 9, 2013


this afternoon was a bit of a story to share. while i was busy shopping., suddenly i bump onto this group of ladies. im like hurmmmmn speechless. trying my best to like cover up. why? cuz they look so familiar.

macam kenal je ye dok. LOL tapi salah sorang dr geng tuh start ckap. mcm kenal je . *giggles* saya pun ulang balik ayat tuh . nnth apa lagi nak ckap. cover cover jugak la kan . tapi, cepat gila minah nih cam i, dia terus ckap 

"Budak Fist Aust"

im like . yea yea. while nodding.

"Kita org budak RCMP. senior korang"

ah ! padan la mcm cam je kan. muka muka jumpa waktu al-mulk. tho i selalu gak ponteng. tapi im not the top gang la ! siap2 pernah receive call supaya balik from lepak and baca al-mulk. *dush ! mmg la i nih naughty . nak baca surah pendek tuh pun , punya la banyak alasan dan helah dibuatnya. but the amaze-ball is they remembered me. truthfully i am well i considered myself as the not so standout team. so , these ladies have some pretty sharp memory after 2 years.

but actually those girls are actually friendly. i asked why are you all here in KL shopping ? cuz i got a friend in rcmp too and she is having exam. and so the spill out la bla bla bla second year thingy. but frankly i am just speechless what to converse. yea, i disgust these rcmp dulu. again i repeat DULU.  they were the HOT yet gedik girls IMO that well i seem to care less. gang gedik and budget mmg gua tak layan ah babe. cuz i got the world to myself when i was in KMKN. ahhhhh mah gusta ! i miss those memories. why la bila nak fly nih, di ambang ambang akhir nih, all those good memories came back . was trying to forget bout that place you know. the 3 months of my life. maybe not for some but for me it means everything.

p/s : i still got so many things to buy, prepare and contact. Insyallah everything will be on time !

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

nothing rich. poor

and nothing beats yesterday.
wasnt much of activities but a little something somewhat to share.

i just to the extend pity the rich , loaded, and very lucky human beings. whom those that never knew the hardship, the meaning of danger, and effort. this came across my mind after a conversation earlier.

this people are born rich . perhaps its not their fault entirely , but you just got to have faith in people below you. without them you are nothing. you cant even get a full meal without the people who work hard for you. perhaps it seems dangerous, perhaps it seems filthy, but nothing beats the sincerity and honesty in where they money came.

yes, cheap stuff do have its sadback. but because of that its cheap and affordable, the whole nation can afford. if you do not want to take that privilage then dont mock , smirk , or insult it. not everyone can afford a luxury automobile to and fro all the time. public transport such as buses and trains are needed by most. not few. whats worst is that they create such an agenda, propaganda to make it look so bad, in addition with their name and fame, people acknowledge . plain stupid. then, there goes the income of those needy ones. getting lesser by the day. what a cocky , egoistic little creatures.

but obviously nothing is 100%. to those that plan their money well and gives back to those in needs needless to say the method should be praise .in short charity.  nothing can repay their good deed enough by the one and only Allah. i salute these people who got the dean and deed in this world.

please please and please. bored with the world of money is everything .then, politics come around and everything turns dirty. i myself disgust hearing those talks, those stories , those agendas, and propagandas. just please come back to Islam. dont get astray , dont get lost, dont let the history repeats itself like Spain. #tears

Monday, March 4, 2013


its raining cats and dogs! suddenly

Sunday, March 3, 2013


saya balik kampong !!! one last visit of my relatives before i go on to further my studies. sayang keluarga ku ! bm ftw!

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Tuesday, February 26, 2013


okay first and foremost , Alhamdulillah we go through the pre departure smooth and clear ! :D
had some issues with my dad cuz he was like " send you at the condo ? Not the same road again ?! 2 freaking years " LOL yea i balik every week and every monday come back to condo by going through all the traffic jam for almost an hour or so . LOL kecian . i punya la scared to go to putrajaya terus sebab in the stated form kena gerak with institusi, padahal , nah kau ! ade je pergi terus sana. ikut sangat rule la nai . LOL

and bla bla bla boring tapi informative la kan . but cerita yg nak habaq ialah dpat rm 20k terus camtuh . tak rasa pape pon sbb its in  but travellers check , yen , and ringgit. bermacam macam jenis, so takdak rasa nilai sangat HAHA sekarang dah kena mula start pikir nak beli apa dah . tapi ramai gak ah td berkumpul dlm dewan untuk pre departure.

paling tak tahan yg waktu MAS punya time. awal2 punya la promote dia hali one world bagai, airbus a380 pastu next slide, " this is the plane yang you all akan naik " ades abeba sungguh ~ kasi suspen je awal awal #sigh

Saturday, February 23, 2013


so its btn , and seriously i just felt something isnt enough .

Monday, February 18, 2013


at last parents are back from thailand.
yes i got family in thailand and singapore ( and of course Malaysia ) see, i mmg la org melayu kan. area sini je, takdak campoq campoq nya .

and so no parents (ade parents pon) play game and watch series. tapi hari ni is just dope !
how sick can it be bila dlm game i nampak kubur and i baca Al- Fatihah ?! seriously ? mcm loading sikit, then baru i sedar oh apa nih its game LOL

and tomorrow starts my BTN for a week at meru Klang. while the aaj got at klia btn camp with is well the hospitality is much better with private rooms and all. unlike us dorm . oh well, you just gotta bersyukur isnt it ? Alhamdulillah btn with intec (korea), mfi (france) and last minute guest msi (spain). talk about different country with different language !  then its usrah right after btn ends, later pre departure . oh my ! hectic. but hey march masih ada !

here is list of items to bring that senpai shared on fb , so i am sharing this too . hope it helps :D

and yesterday , hurm ? nothing interesting happened to me today but my fingers just felt like typing and ideas just felt like going out somewhere, and the blog is the answer

and so, early this morning, my junior suddenly IM me asking whether i got a form 1 sister in langkawi. say what ? sorry i am the last child. the juniors where so excited and making up conclusion which isnt real at all . HAHA but at least its somewhat a discovery. i yet found another human being that looks like me ! yea. my face is a typical face , perhaps should considered myself to be a double agent should i ? LOL

i remembered when i was still schooling in subang jaya, an SU sejarah teacher look like me. well my friend teased me a lot so i knew. lol miss u man, wonder where are you now, i remembered i called him joker, never care to ask his real name cuz he is just my tuition friend.

then a friend of mine from taping said her schoolmate looks like me, and guess what this time i met face to face with that girl. sadly if you ask me, well i wont say we look similar but maybe a tiny bit.

one day i went to this saloon, this lady who did my hair said she had a friend that look just like me. her friend is an air stewardess working oversea but obviously much taller than i am . that is sad. i am short . she said when i came at her saloon she was shocked like how could her friend be here in Malaysia , is it some kind of a joke or what ? guess that i really look like her friend afterall since it cause her to think i am her friend's ghost LOL

and the last one was when i was on a flight and the air steward well, as i was boarding the plane, i noticed he somewhat stared at me differently , as if he wanted to say hi or something. but obeviously he didnt with my grumpy face who dares to even say hi. and so after the plane landed. i was grumpy still, but less. as i was walking to my way out, he asked whether we have met somewhere ? and oh my obviously no. asked my age and i said i am still a student impossible to be his friend LOL and that was it , till we meet again .

and so that was some few incidents but along the way there are still some that i met but couldnt remmbered it clearly. perhaps there are no prominent story behind it so its easy to forget. one thing is for sure, i am pure malay and my face is everywhere around asia. LOL

parents are still away and goodness my breakfast routine are like lelaki bujang dah. brothers all woek up late , dinner memang pizza je la kan . HAHA still havent done my birthday shopping

Friday, February 15, 2013


so here i am on a blissful february friday 15th .

lets start with the good story shall we ?
Alhamdulillah i got the university i wanted. Shizuoka Daigaku. yes its not ichiryuu daigaku but i dont give a shit about it. people target ichiryuu dai , but hey no for me. im going for an easier road. yes ichiryuu dai are just like everyone's dream to enrol but it pays a price and sadly that is something that i cant do. for me i have suffered enough studying at ibt and i am not gonna suffer or hurt myself again just to achieve this scroll of degree in japan. i am a lay back girl. so i choose a more relax road. plus i plan to take masters so yea have to rock this degree out hell well then go for masters. insyaallah will be flying there this 23rd march . Alhamdulillah once again.

then i realised oh my goodness, kena hantar lagi email kat pak cik accommodation tuh. aduyai why cant placement and accommodation just contact each other ? why do i have to inform everything aduih. life oh life. it is soo easy, isnt it.

and so then today my friend called i asking to go out. yes i am free to go out but hurmmm i dont like the way its going. you wanna go out with a girl , and the girl will go out if i go too. so what the heck ? the power is in my hand ? shut it. go date on your own and have some courage. dont drag me into it. dont hung me up cuz i said no and causes her not to go. losers. im like what the heck ? so desperate to make me go ke until a third party got involved. dont have to be  desperados babeyh. it will work eventually if its written.  the chronicles :
mr a texted me > me texted mrs b > mr a called me > me texted mrs b > suddenly mr c called me > mr a called me

oh how a lot of things happened in just a few hours. and now my parents are off to thailand cuz theres sick relative there. tho how badly i wanna go i cant do that. my passport is still being process for visa and all. goodness who knows when i might see those long forgotten relatives again. nothing is sure cuz
 its the future.

I use to make a wish on them when I caught one of them in the palm of my hand

Monday, February 11, 2013

game profession

okay i dah jd game freak now. 12 hours plus playing ps. aduih

Saturday, February 9, 2013


okay i dont.celebrate valentine. but oh my ! i want this card so bad !!!! anyone ? be my bloody valentine just for.this time please ?

Friday, February 8, 2013

down under

and here goea it. i went down south to johor.
i rasa last i went was, hurmm when saya still tak pakai tudung ?!. lol. lama tuh. now obviously, dah turun johor nih legoland la jawapannya. previously i always heard negative feedback bout it, well even malaysian themselves said it. so i witness it with myself. hahaha. my first impression is COMEL !
okay la, if i wanna compare to tokyo disneyland mmg tak sama taraf la kan. tokyo tuh the biggest nih , legoland still baru bukak. nmpak sangat diorg nak test market. my parents whom were just sitting round drinking coffee at the cafe, were approached by one of the staff, i mean no regular staff cuz their uniform is different, on how is the legoland. okay ayat english ak keling. bluek ! so now, the hotel and waterpark is under construction . non other than sunway corporation itself. reasonable la kan. sunway lagoon pon diorg buat.

and yea today berjaya help my friend on well kinda in telling the ugly truth my we should spend and have integrity as malaysian. spend inside the malaysia , to help the malaysia economy. grrrrrr boring talk.

so but today what i wanna emphasize is on how shocking it is, to see there is still people scrambling the garbage for food. ade org kaya boleh memilih mknn. oh world.

Thursday, February 7, 2013


and a mother ask her daughter what did she want for her 20th birthday. the daughter replied a diamond ring. then the mother asked again, why that when she can have it from solemnization of  marridge. and she replied, because i dont want to get married.

Wednesday, February 6, 2013


okay today is all about gratitude

i'm annoyed that is why i write. here goes nothing to me, something to everyone

scholarship? hard to get ?
yea right . theres gizillion of opportunities now. seriously if you didnt get right after SPM u can get it after foundation Insyallah . so chillax theres alway oppurtunity out there. just waiting for you to grab it . seriosuly speaking.

so why insult your own scholar ?
if you dont like the way it handles you . then dont take it. like i said in my previous post, dont take the scholar because of who sponsored you. take because of the course they sponsored you and how they treat you. dont rush , think, research first on the scholarship given . nothing is that easy .

and now, what bothers me is that people whine to much . nah it is not wrong, complaints are very good for improvement . but hey watch your words. i wouldnt go to the bound of saying all those meany words and despicable sentences if i am still under that scholar. you are still gonna need their help. if you are that great , if you dont like it that much , then leave.

its a shame to you and that scholar.
 though how shitty they did to you always try your best to repay back in a good way. i believe Islam taught us all this. try exchanging the word scholars to parents. it might be too big to compare at least something closer to all of us. you wouldnt open out and speak out their darkside in public wouldnt you ?

lol and dont get me wrong. i am not supporting monocratic but i do support democratic. sometimes people complaint too much and at the wrong place. and i myself is a no 1 complainer . once i find it wrong i will say out . i will point out. but to the right person in charge.

bazir air liur je ckap bagai nak rak weyh ! malukan diri ade la

Saturday, February 2, 2013

Tuesday, January 29, 2013


esok lawatan perodua !!!!!!!
can i ask, why girls mudah jatuh to guys offer. its like once you love that guy , why you would agree on everything. for me its foolish. foolish to believe guys that fast perhaps my bitter thought me . but i still find girls are easy to be deceive. 



Friday, January 25, 2013

maulud nabi

salam maal hijrah 1434 !
basically lets selawat banyak le atas Nabi Muhammad S.A.W.
when i was a kid, i always asked myself, why i wasnt born in the era as the Prophet. nak teringin sangat jumpa Baginda..... and he is the best and most perfect guy you could ever find. :3

the masjid in taman desa. sangat aktif. hebat ! padahal major kat sini is non-muslim. perhaps because they are the minority that they turned out to be a very united community.

then , early morning i managed to send some ps games to my friends house. what became the issue was, as i text him i'm on the way, boleh pulak hang g mandi. weyh ak just wanna hand over the games la, like i noticed you mandi ke tak. lol . very hygenic person i'll say.

and along the way, my dad asked what to do with the money he saved for my education. i was like shocked! eh bapak ada simpan...? cet awat la tak habaq awai awai noh~! penat eden belajar ejar biasiswa..... 

Wednesday, January 23, 2013


living with human nuisance is absurdly stressful and unbearable. only the fittest survive .

cant agree no.more. cuz its me who create it lol ! okay .

yesterday i just had my presentation . well i wont brag much but im pretty happy and satisfied with my outcome. the presentation is like a whole life circle. its includes everything, death , science, birth and even meaningful message. what ever the comment will be, i am just happy the way it is.

i am just annoyed with people you are always around. probably because you are bored, but i just miss my subang jaya. i am not trying to boast , but that place is where my true childhood is. the people that i can be stupid with. i actually am missing my subang girls.

then today we had like loads of time to waste . morning nnth apa nnth buat handout. but all the current handout now is basically bout lifestyle in japan. then tea.ceremony, japan style syair and lastly origami. just before class end, we had to write letter of appriciation to the members of jckl for teaching us. lol. sgt la banyak masa weyhhhh

varsity.( taboo )

okay this post is all about varsity . here goes.

the project started with the idea to create the batch shirt. so then, the person in charge are voted and elected. so whatever.

conflict 1
what to do. girls wanted sweater like one of our girls were wearing. then some wanted sport jersey. some wanted sweater with hood like korean what so ever and the suggestion goes on .  so after much deliberation we went with varsity.

conflict 2
we had conflict with the names and design. during the holidays i ask them to give ideas of batch names and colour. thank you to those yg participate and excited bg names ,  design. then its the moment to vote., the the votes were cast and counted. this is the part where i start to get annoyed. they dont participate . if you didnt then just agree with the result.

[ order were placed at the shop. ]

conflict 3
we had our first varsity batch meeting at school. everyone was complaining bout the choosen name. but i say , thats the voting result. seriously why werent you alert on the notice given.  well i.understand some dont have the privilage of having internet 24/7 but you can tell the person in charge bout your prob and then we can help you. alas, the name of amigos is concluded during the meeting.

conflict 4
dateline. okay this first world problem the shop did not follow the due date. the reason given was we suddenly change the names and size at eleventh hour. wtf ?! it isnt that late okay. they still got plenty of times to get it settled. when a reminder was send a week before duedate, its as if they havent start a single thing.

conflict 5
so the varsity was picked up . tho the names in katakata wasnt done. for the sake of wearing it together during EJU. but they did one size wrong. reason, lost in factory . fcuk.

conflict 6
the varsity was not send back as schedule because we wanted the wrong size to be corrected. if not we wilk be on the negative side.

conflict 7
charge is different. at first they said its rm 7. then bla bla bla rm10. but obviously its rm 7 that were paid because only that amount was collected

conflict 8
instead of 31 only 30 varsity. there is one of us that didnt give back for names to be sew. what i find weird is, didnt you all count how many varsity.were there because sending it off .

so in conclusion i"ll say the varsity is taboo !

Monday, January 21, 2013

2nd last week.

so here i am finishing the last bits of ibt. oh how i wish this end quick. like real quick !

the past few weeks had been , well different and interesting. but that doesnt mean we are free from kanji test and textbook . yup thats right , we still study ! blurrgh !

but thankfully presentation by my fellow mates were fun. i think my only reason coming to school is to listen to my friends presentation and showing my best behavior, just so that i'll get good recomendation.

so basically of course i did skip school and hang out with some friends. lol it isnt entirely wrong considering everyone is doing it.

in contrast , there are 2 questions that really bothers me when people ask .

1. hows your result
2. when are you gonna finish ibt

goodness gracious , all i do to answer is just smile. dah terlalu letih and annoyed with those questions. perhaps i cpuld just throw a smile at them and they poof away. lol so what i thought

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Tuesday, January 15, 2013


every breath i took is poisonous. it went down tru my trachea and make my lung shrink. then it went back up and out. my every limbs are shaking. im scared to face tomorrow. oh Allah help me.

Tuesday, January 8, 2013


and yes, my  3weeks holiday i fill it up nicely with loads of activities and chillax moment to myself.
#will update more

but for now cant wait for this weekend. nk jumpa smua org !! just cant wait till all my family gather ! yay! insyaallah

Tuesday, January 1, 2013


alhamdulillah for today
but it doesnt change a bit that im grounded. lol
happy new year 2013. this is a record i had to be grounded. aduih. but yeah i know entirely its always my fault. so after this i'm 20. damn it , so old wow !
somewhat a video of reminiscences